High School Years (and all of the people in them)

When people hear my name many years from now, I want them to think of me in a much different way than they think of me now. I want to be seen as a friend to all and a generous, loving, kind, etc. person. I don't want to be the person I am now. All anybody sees when they look at me is a book-loving nerd that doesn't go outside of her circle most of the time. Instead, I hope to be the girl that everyone knows they can find a true friend in.

My life has been carefully molded around the lives of the people in my world and I will consider to do so. If people lose their place in my life, I want it to be their fault, (Tres harsh). I don't want to look back at my life and feel terrible and horrible because I ruined or missed out on a good friendship. Numerous, countless, people have lost their place already and I do regret that some of those lost relationships were my fault.

For those that are still in my life, or have just entered, I pray that you will always be there. Among the ones that mean most to me and that I must let you know about are as follows(In no specific order):

My cousin Tegan-We've grown up together since before I can remember and so many laughs have been shared with you. There was a point where we barely talked or even saw each other, but about 11 months ago, you re-entered and I had an actual big sister again. I appreciate all that you have done for me and I hope we will forever be close, even though you're starting a family and I'll be off to the east soon.

Holly-I'm so beyond glad that my prayers came through when you didn't move across the country as expected. I don't know where I would be without you. I don't know how I would have gotten through the last tough months without you. I already wrote a much more detailed note to you, so I'm sure you already know how much you mean to me.

Heather-I was not as into God and Christianity until I met you. Sure, you were a freak at first, but that's what made me come back to youth and it sucks so much that you're no longer in our youth group. I will always remember you until I get old and I hope to touch lives like you have touched mine. Keep being you!

Nathan (AKA Honso AKA Pirate)-Where do I even start to describe your sheer awesomeness? I can always count on you for a good conversation or a good rant. I don't think there's anyone I trust as much as I trust you and I hope you trust me as well. I can see our friendship going a long way in the future. Sometimes when I'm in the worst possible mood, I just have to pick up my phone and you're usually there with a genius way to make me laugh. Laughter goes so far with me and I'm glad I can share so much of it with you.

Ian-(Yep. Your ex is on here and you must think it's humorous)Ironically enough, you keep me in tune with reality. When things change in my life, I can always count on you to lift me up and help keep me on task even if you don't know it. I always have so much fun around you even if we're at a dumb speech meet or are sitting in an emo corner listening to screamo and watching farmers hump each other. I know I used to really dislike you and I'm glad that I no longer want to kick the crap out of you, or at least hire someone because I'm too much of a wuss. Keep up the annoyingness and utter awesomeness!

Shortcake Strawberry Stephanie-Again, where do I begin? You always know how to make me laugh, even though it isn't on purpose. It's a shame we don't see each other as much as we would like to, but who says that's the most important thing in a friendship? I've known you for what seems like a millennium and I know that I can tell you anything, free of any judging. Stay gold, Ponyboy, stay gold. Or in your case, Mexican. :P JK Love ya!

Lauren (AKA Dean)-Your probably pissed enough that Ian is one person away from you and you probably read that laughing, or you stared at the words before clicking the back button because there were too many (JK). Anywho, I've told you before how I value you as my friend, but sometimes I don't think you get it. I'm sad to see that we have really lost touch, but you and your spazticness will always be a part of me. Somehow, you always know something is wrong even if I'm smiling. Thanks for being there when others weren't.

Michael, my moon-I don't think I even need to say anything to you. This entire blog is dedicated to you. I love you and miss you and I hope that you're happy with grandma and I know you'll get a kick out of Daniel.

If you aren't one of the above, I promise that that doesn't mean I don't love you as much as I love the ones above. It probably just means that Nathan is getting impatient and I'm hungry. I promise if you stick around, you'll see your own paragraph in another post. There's too many people in my life that are killer cool. I don't know how I'll ever fit you all in. I'm extremely gifted to have such an amazing cast in my life. Thanks to all of you!